Putting on someone else’s shoes
Role play has been a popular sexual activity for decades, giving couples a chance to pretend to be someone else, creating a unique, erotic scenario from scratch.
Obviously, in-person role play has been the norm for a very long time, but with new technologies come new ways to play.
This is especially good news for couples currently in a long-distance relationship, unable to play with each other in-person for months, or even years, at a time.
That’s why we’ve come up with several role play ideas for texting with your partner, whether you’re 300 miles or 300 feet apart from each other.
Now, before we talk about specific role play characters and scenarios that you can try with your partner (if you want to take a peek at our ideas, feel free to scroll down), we’d like to talk about some important considerations you should keep in mind when you’re both preparing for some text-based role play.
Before launching into any new sexual activity or kink with your partner, it’s really important to prepare yourself and your partner for what it might include.
This is also the perfect chance to make those experiences even more exciting by brainstorming erotic ideas that you can try out.
Even more important here is making sure that both you and your partner feel safe and content when you’re actually engaged in role play.
Talk about your fantasies
This is probably the most enjoyable part of the preparation process. It’s when you and your partner can talk about what you want to try.
Throw some fantasies out there. Tell your partner what roles you’d like to play and what those scenarios could look like.
With in-person role play, this might be tricky because it can involve actual costumes and performance to a certain degree.
But with role play through texting, it will be a lot easier to play a part. It’s about writing, not performance, language and not visuals.
In other words, while you might be intimidated by the idea of pretending to be a fantasy character who can make others do their bidding, playing that same character through a text conversation will be ten times easier and less demanding on your acting abilities.
This stage is also a great time to talk to some friends and other couples about the fantasies they’ve explored in the past. You just might come across a few ideas that sound exciting and, well, let’s say ‘titillating.’
Going back to the idea of making sure that you and your partner feel safe during role play over text, make sure to establish limits with them.
If you don’t want your role play sessions to include exchanging photos and videos, make that clear right from the start.
If you don’t want to include harsh language and belittling commands, tell them.
Sure, there might be new limits that come up after you’ve played a few times, but giving a good idea of what would be too much for you will do a lot to make these experiences more comfortable for everyone.
Safety and security
Lastly, cybersecurity is a big concern for couples who like to play with each other over text or other app-based messaging programs.
Something to keep in mind here is that no service can guarantee cybersecurity. Whether it’s your messaging app, Snapchat, or Facebook Messenger, there’s always a chance that your account could be breached.
This is even more worrying given that just about every service stores all of your messages indefinitely.
If this idea doesn’t bother you, then you won’t need to think about it too much. But if you’re concerned that your messages will somehow be leaked in the future, then we recommend looking into messaging apps that offer advanced encryption or the ability to sign up anonymously.
Role play characters and scenarios
Alright, with all the boring stuff out of the way, let’s get to the fun parts. We’ve thought up some spicy role play characters and scenarios that should work especially well for text conversations.
Whether you try just one or all of them in a row is completely up to you and your partner. Feel free to let us know which of these sparked your interest the most!
It’s time to hit the reset button, at least for an afternoon. Whether or not you’ve tried online dating services in the past, it can be exciting to strike up a conversation with an attractive stranger.
That’s the idea behind this role play scenario: you and your partner are total strangers who recently found each other online and started talking.
Each of you can create a unique persona with an entire backstory. Decide where you’re from, who you are, and what you do for a living. If you’re having trouble coming up with ideas, you can base this character on secret desires and aspirations you’ve had for years.
That way, as you and your partner get to know each other’s characters, you’ll also be getting to know a side of yourselves that you haven’t seen before.
If things advance to the point of sharing pictures and/or videos, don’t be afraid to be a bit coy. Let your partner really work for their reward.
For a different approach, you and your partner can pretend to be coworkers at a large company.
This is another fairly common fantasy that’s much safer to explore within the context of role play. It has all the flavor of a forbidden romance without the more serious implications of going against protocol.
You can create unique characters if you want, or you can base your persona on how you act at your real-life places of work– whatever feels best to you.
As for the power dynamic that you’d like to strike, it’s totally up to you. Some couples find it more interesting to simply role play as two coworkers on the same level who are sneaking around without anyone noticing.
Other couples might want to make the scenario a bit more spicy by making the power dynamic a bit more skewed to one side.
If one of you would like to role play as a manager or superior, go for it! This definitely adds some weight to the forbidden aspect. It’s also a chance to take a typical power dynamic and turn it on its head.
Whoever the ‘superior’ happens to be could end up being the more submissive one during your texting encounters.
Together you can make secret plans to meet on the sly, away from the prying eyes of your fictional coworkers.
If you want to expand the role play to real-life encounters, you can both wear work-appropriate clothing before you get down to business, so to speak.
Doctor and patient
One role play scenario that is both considered a classic as well as being a definite taboo is a relationship between a doctor and a patient.
This scenario definitely has a power dynamic baked into it, so be prepared for it. Technically speaking, either role could be dominant or submissive, depending on your preferences.
Maybe the doctor is taking the examination a bit too far, or maybe the patient is coming on a bit strong during an otherwise normal visit.
As far as texting goes, the “patient” could start by asking the doctor for advice about their sex life. You should be able to find some fun places to go from there.
If you’re feeling really creative, the power dynamic could even flip part way through, with one character becoming more dominant as time goes on.
Dom and sub
While the dominant/submissive role play scenario is nothing new, it does offer some exciting opportunities, especially to couples who haven’t explored this side of themselves before.
In this scenario, decide at the outset who is going to be the dominant figure and who is going to be their submissive.
If you don’t like thinking up your own specifics for each scenario, then this is the one for you!
There’s such a rich history of kinks and play scenarios within the BDSM community, and many of them work for long-distance relationships, or even just for afternoons that you can’t spend together in-person.
To oversimplify the dynamic, just think of it as one extended game of truth or dare, except that it’s going to be mostly dares and only one person will be handing them out to the other.
Depending on the limits you’ve agreed to beforehand, it’s the job of the dominant person to give commands to the submissive, who then needs to follow those orders exactly.
During a text conversation, this could involve telling the submissive to do some slightly risky things wherever they are, like sneaking a naughty selfie in the nearest bathroom or even wearing a sex toy for the whole day.
That way, when you both have the chance to spend time in-person again, the play can extend to commands that take place in the bedroom.
But in the meantime, you’ll build up a nice collection of long-distance commands and activities that you can look back on in your text history whenever you want!